WEBVTT 00:10.144 --> 00:11.245 - * ONE, TWO, THREE... 00:11.279 --> 00:13.314 * ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE, SIX * 00:13.347 --> 00:15.383 * TAKE IT, DUDE 00:15.416 --> 00:22.056 * 00:32.300 --> 00:33.467 * ONE, TWO, THREE 00:33.501 --> 00:36.036 * GO, GO 00:41.142 --> 00:44.145 [dance music] 00:44.178 --> 00:52.120 * 01:14.175 --> 01:17.511 * TAKE ME HIGHER 01:17.545 --> 01:21.182 * TAKE ME HIGHER 01:21.215 --> 01:23.784 * TAKE ME HIGHER 01:23.817 --> 01:28.389 * TAKE ME HIGHER 01:28.422 --> 01:29.857 - THE THING YOU NEED TO KNOW IS, 01:29.890 --> 01:31.492 IT'S ALL ABOUT SEX. 01:31.525 --> 01:33.361 IT'S TRUE. 01:33.394 --> 01:36.430 IN FACT, THEY SAY MEN THINK ABOUT SEX EVERY 28 SECONDS. 01:36.464 --> 01:40.534 OF COURSE, THAT'S STRAIGHT MEN. WITH GAY MEN IT'S EVERY 9. 01:40.568 --> 01:43.371 YOU CAN BE AT THE SUPERMARKET OR THE LAUNDROMAT 01:43.404 --> 01:45.206 OR BUYING A FABULOUS SHIRT 01:45.239 --> 01:48.309 WHEN SUDDENLY YOU FIND YOURSELF CHECKING OUT SOME HOT GUY. 01:48.342 --> 01:49.810 HOTTER THAN THE ONE YOU SAW LAST WEEKEND 01:49.843 --> 01:51.479 OR WENT HOME WITH THE NIGHT BEFORE, 01:51.512 --> 01:53.481 WHICH EXPLAINS WHY WE'RE ALL AT BABYLON 01:53.514 --> 01:57.151 AT 1:00 IN THE MORNING INSTEAD OF AT HOME IN BED. 01:57.185 --> 01:59.187 BUT WHO WANTS TO BE AT HOME IN BED? 01:59.220 --> 02:01.622 ESPECIALLY ALONE, WHEN YOU CAN BE HERE, 02:01.655 --> 02:05.426 KNOWING THAT AT ANY MOMENT YOU MIGHT SEE "HIM," 02:05.459 --> 02:08.762 THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN WHO EVER LIVED. 02:08.796 --> 02:10.764 THAT IS, UNTIL TOMORROW NIGHT. 02:10.798 --> 02:20.241 * 02:20.274 --> 02:24.178 BY THE WAY, THAT'S ME, 6'1," 46-INCH CHEST, 02:24.212 --> 02:26.247 16-INCH BICEPS, 28-INCH WAIST. 02:26.280 --> 02:28.482 A VERITABLE GOD... 02:28.516 --> 02:30.951 I WISH. 02:30.984 --> 02:32.820 OKAY, THAT'S ME. 02:32.853 --> 02:34.288 MICHAEL NOVOTNY, THE SEMI-CUTE 02:34.322 --> 02:35.723 "BOY NEXT DOOR" TYPE. 02:35.756 --> 02:40.628 29, 5'10," 140, 9-1/2 CUT; ALL RIGHT, SO I EXAGGERATE, 02:40.661 --> 02:42.863 BUT LIKE, WHO'S TOLD THE TRUTH SINCE THEY INVENTED CYBERSEX? 02:42.896 --> 02:46.867 * 02:46.900 --> 02:49.303 - WHEN DID '70s NIGHT BECOME '80s NIGHT? 02:49.337 --> 02:51.439 - I REMEMBER THIS SONG FROM HIGH SCHOOL. 02:51.472 --> 02:52.740 TALK ABOUT FEELING ANCIENT. 02:52.773 --> 02:56.444 - SPEAK FOR YOURSELF, HONEY. I WAS A MERE CHILD. 02:56.477 --> 02:57.511 - THOSE ARE MY TWO BUDDIES, 02:57.545 --> 02:59.413 TED AND EMMETT. 02:59.447 --> 03:01.715 - GIVE ME THOSE DIVAS OF DISCO ANY DAY. 03:01.749 --> 03:02.650 GLORIA GAYNOR. 03:02.683 --> 03:05.319 - DONNA SUMMER. - AND MISS ALICIA BRIDGES. 03:05.353 --> 03:06.954 * I LOVE THE NIGHT LIFE - OH! 03:06.987 --> 03:08.989 all: * I LIKE TO BOOGIE 03:09.022 --> 03:10.691 * ON THE DISCO ROUND 03:10.724 --> 03:12.926 * AH-H-H-H 03:12.960 --> 03:14.962 - OH...MY GOD. 03:14.995 --> 03:17.298 HAVE YOU EVER SEEN ANYTHING MORE BEAUTIFUL? 03:17.331 --> 03:19.300 - VENICE, AT SUNSET. 03:19.333 --> 03:21.302 - FINE, YOU GO DOWN THE GRAND CANAL, 03:21.335 --> 03:22.703 I'LL GO DOWN ON HIM. 03:22.736 --> 03:25.406 - OOH... 03:25.439 --> 03:27.007 - EMMETT CAN BE A LITTLE CAMPY. 03:27.040 --> 03:29.310 OKAY, A LOT CAMPY. BUT YOU GOT TO ADMIT, 03:29.343 --> 03:30.844 THESE DAYS, IT TAKES REAL GUTS 03:30.878 --> 03:32.846 TO BE A QUEEN IN A WORLD FULL OF COMMONERS. 03:32.880 --> 03:34.515 - THE PROBLEM WITH PERFECTION 03:34.548 --> 03:35.916 IS ITS INABILITY TO RECOGNIZE 03:35.949 --> 03:37.851 ANYTHING LESS PERFECT THAN ITSELF. 03:37.885 --> 03:39.853 - IN OTHER WORDS, YOU HIT ON HIM, 03:39.887 --> 03:41.889 AND HE TURNED YOU DOWN. 03:41.922 --> 03:43.791 - YEAH. 03:43.824 --> 03:45.593 - TED'S THIS REALLY SMART GUY, 03:45.626 --> 03:47.295 AND HE'S GOT A REALLY BIG HEART. 03:47.328 --> 03:50.398 ONLY, NOBODY HERE IS INTERESTED IN THE SIZE OF THAT ORGAN. 03:50.431 --> 03:51.399 - WHY AM I WASTING MY TIME 03:51.432 --> 03:53.601 STARING AT A BUNCH OF OVER-PUMPED PRINCESSES 03:53.634 --> 03:56.370 WITH IQs SMALLER THAN THEIR WAIST... 03:56.404 --> 03:58.439 JESUS, LOOK AT HIM. 03:58.472 --> 04:00.808 - LIKE I SAID, IT'S ALL ABOUT SEX. 04:00.841 --> 04:02.510 EXCEPT WHEN YOU'RE HAVING IT. 04:02.543 --> 04:04.978 AND THEN IT'S ALL ABOUT, "WILL HE STAY? WILL HE GO? 04:05.012 --> 04:08.282 HOW AM I DOING? WHAT AM I DOING?" 04:08.316 --> 04:12.720 UNLESS, OF COURSE, YOU'RE BRIAN KINNEY. 04:12.753 --> 04:15.022 AND THEN IT'S, "WHO GIVES A FUCK WHAT YOU THINK? 04:15.055 --> 04:17.024 YOU'RE LUCKY TO HAVE ME." 04:17.057 --> 04:26.900 * 04:26.934 --> 04:28.035 I'LL GET BRIAN. 04:28.068 --> 04:38.078 * 04:38.111 --> 04:43.484 * 04:43.517 --> 04:46.420 [men moaning] 04:57.765 --> 04:59.733 HEY, TODD, HOW'S IT GOING? - FINE. 04:59.767 --> 05:04.638 [music, whooping in background] 05:04.672 --> 05:06.540 - WE NEED TO GO. 05:06.574 --> 05:08.542 WE WANT TO EAT. 05:08.576 --> 05:09.877 - I'M JUST GOING TO GIVE HIM MY NUMBER. 05:09.910 --> 05:12.413 - WHAT'D YOU DO, WRITE IT ON YOUR DICK? 05:12.446 --> 05:16.717 HOW LONG IS THIS GOING TO TAKE? 05:16.750 --> 05:18.486 - TEN MINUTES. 05:18.519 --> 05:20.554 TOPS. 05:20.588 --> 05:21.589 - [scoffs] 05:21.622 --> 05:23.591 [chatter and laughter] 05:31.832 --> 05:32.833 - HMM, BRUNO. 05:32.866 --> 05:35.603 LOVE YOUR OUTFIT. 05:35.636 --> 05:38.972 NOT EVERYONE CAN WEAR TANGERINE. 05:39.006 --> 05:41.575 - HOW LONG ARE WE GOING TO WAIT? I'VE GOT TO WORK IN THE MORNING. 05:41.609 --> 05:43.444 - WHO DOESN'T? HE SAID HE'D BE RIGHT OUT. 05:43.477 --> 05:44.845 - YEAH, WE'VE ALL HEARD THAT BEFORE. 05:44.878 --> 05:46.547 - THIS IS SOME GREAT SYSTEM HE'S GOT. 05:46.580 --> 05:49.082 HE GETS TO PARTY ALL NIGHT AND YOU DRIVE HIM HOME. 05:49.116 --> 05:50.984 - IT'S NO BIG DEAL, OKAY? 05:51.018 --> 05:54.955 - MM. DON'T LOOK NOW BUT, UH, SOMEBODY'S WATCHING. 05:57.991 --> 06:00.861 - OH, HIM. HE HAS BEEN CRUISING ME ALL NIGHT. 06:00.894 --> 06:02.863 - MM, PLAYING HARD TO GET. 06:02.896 --> 06:04.732 I LOVE THAT IN A MAN. 06:04.765 --> 06:06.567 - NOT PLAYING, JUST NOT INTERESTED. 06:06.600 --> 06:08.602 - CHECK OUT THAT BUBBLE BUTT. 06:08.636 --> 06:10.438 AND THAT BASKET. 06:10.471 --> 06:12.139 ENOUGH IN THERE FOR THE BIG, BAD WOLF. 06:12.172 --> 06:14.608 - WOULD YOU QUIT STARING? 06:14.642 --> 06:16.610 THERE'S MORE TO A GUY THAN HIS COCK SIZE. 06:16.644 --> 06:17.711 - HMM. 06:17.745 --> 06:19.112 - LOOK AT THAT! 06:21.915 --> 06:23.851 - OR HIS PERFECTLY-SHAPED ASS. 06:23.884 --> 06:24.852 [laughter] 06:24.885 --> 06:26.654 - WHICH IS WHY YOU READ ALL THOSE COMIC BOOKS 06:26.687 --> 06:28.622 WITH THOSE SUPERHEROES IN THEIR LITTLE TIGHTS-- 06:28.656 --> 06:29.457 FOR THE PLOT. 06:29.490 --> 06:31.492 - I TOLD YOU, I AM NOT INTERESTED. 06:31.525 --> 06:33.160 - WELL, MAYBE JUST FOR ONCE YOU SHOULD BE. 06:33.193 --> 06:34.828 SHOW A CERTAIN SOMEONE HE'S NOT THE ONLY ONE 06:34.862 --> 06:36.930 WHO CAN SCORE. 06:44.738 --> 06:48.041 - * WHERE'S MY LOVER 06:48.075 --> 06:51.945 * WHERE IS MY LOVE TONIGHT 06:51.979 --> 06:55.649 * WHERE'S MY LOVER 06:55.683 --> 07:00.654 * WHERE IS MY LOVE TONIGHT 07:00.688 --> 07:04.191 * WHOO OOH OOH OOH 07:04.224 --> 07:05.593 * YEAH 07:05.626 --> 07:07.528 * 07:07.561 --> 07:12.199 * WHOA OH OH 07:12.232 --> 07:13.634 * HMM 07:13.667 --> 07:14.935 - 'SCUSE ME. 07:14.968 --> 07:17.204 UH, COULD YOU TELL ME, LIKE, 07:17.237 --> 07:20.107 WHERE'S A GOOD PLACE TO GO? 07:20.140 --> 07:22.810 - DEPENDS WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR. 07:22.843 --> 07:24.745 YOU WANT TWINKIES, GO TO BOYTOY. 07:24.778 --> 07:26.880 YOU WANT LEATHER, GO TO THE MEATHOOK. 07:26.914 --> 07:28.649 IF YOU WANT SNOTTY, CONCEITED ASSHOLES 07:28.682 --> 07:31.952 WHO THINK THEY'RE BETTER THAN EVERYBODY ELSE, TRY PISTOL. 07:31.985 --> 07:33.987 IT'S KIND OF LATE TO BE OUT, THOUGH, ISN'T IT? 07:34.021 --> 07:36.524 ESPECIALLY ON A SCHOOL NIGHT. 07:36.557 --> 07:37.991 WHY DON'T YOU COME HOME WITH ME, HUH? 07:38.025 --> 07:39.960 - NO THANKS. - [chuckles] 07:39.993 --> 07:42.630 GO ON HOME TO YOUR MOMMY. 07:42.663 --> 07:44.632 GO ON. 07:52.239 --> 07:55.576 [indistinct chatter] 07:56.744 --> 07:58.679 - THAT WAS QUICK. 07:58.712 --> 08:01.882 - WELL, WHEN YOU'VE HAD AS MUCH PRACTICE AS HE'S HAD... 08:01.915 --> 08:03.651 - I GOT BORED. 08:03.684 --> 08:06.086 - I KNOW. GETTING YOUR DICK SUCKED CAN BE SO TEDIOUS. 08:06.119 --> 08:07.521 - WELL, HE LOOKED PRETTY HOT TO ME. 08:07.555 --> 08:09.890 - ANYBODY WOULD LOOK HOT TO YOU. 08:26.974 --> 08:29.176 - AND THAT'S WHEN IT HAPPENED. 08:29.209 --> 08:30.811 WHEN HE CAME ALONG. 08:30.844 --> 08:33.814 [techno music] 08:33.847 --> 08:37.818 * 08:37.851 --> 08:39.787 - HOW'S IT GOING? 08:39.820 --> 08:42.756 YOU HAD A BUSY NIGHT? 08:42.790 --> 08:45.893 - JUST, UH, CHECKING OUT THE BARS, YOU KNOW? 08:45.926 --> 08:48.028 BOYTOY, MEATHOOK. 08:48.061 --> 08:50.931 - THE MEATHOOK? REALLY? 08:50.964 --> 08:53.934 SO YOU'RE INTO LEATHER? 08:53.967 --> 08:56.870 - SURE. 08:56.904 --> 08:58.105 - WHERE YOU HEADED? 08:58.138 --> 09:01.742 - NO PLACE SPECIAL. 09:01.775 --> 09:04.077 - I CAN CHANGE THAT. 09:04.111 --> 09:05.646 - HEY! 09:05.679 --> 09:07.047 HEY! WHAT ABOUT US? 09:07.080 --> 09:08.816 - YOU CAN RIDE WITH TED. 09:08.849 --> 09:10.751 - THANKS A LOT. - ASSHOLE! 09:13.320 --> 09:17.024 - WELL, IF IT ISN'T MISS RIDING HOOD AND HER BIG BASKET. 09:17.057 --> 09:21.161 - FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO STALK. I'M NOT INTERESTED. 09:21.194 --> 09:23.163 GO HOME. 09:31.238 --> 09:32.205 - COMING IN? 09:32.239 --> 09:33.941 - HMM? 09:33.974 --> 09:36.376 OH, YEAH. 09:36.409 --> 09:38.746 - SHUT THE DOOR. 10:02.803 --> 10:05.739 - THIS IS A... REALLY NICE PLACE. 10:17.017 --> 10:19.086 I LIKE YOUR KITCHEN. 10:19.119 --> 10:20.921 - DO YOU LIKE SPECIAL K? 10:22.322 --> 10:23.757 - IT'S OKAY. 10:23.791 --> 10:26.393 I LIKE CHEERIOS BETTER. 10:26.426 --> 10:29.797 - I DON'T MEAN THE KIND YOU EAT WITH BANANAS. 10:29.830 --> 10:34.001 MY DISCO-PHARMACOLOGIST COOKS THIS UP FOR ME. 10:34.034 --> 10:36.870 - I'M REALLY ALLERGIC TO A LOT OF DRUGS. 10:36.904 --> 10:38.371 THE DOCTOR GAVE ME PENICILLIN ONCE-- 10:38.405 --> 10:39.873 NEARLY KILLED ME. 10:39.907 --> 10:41.208 AND... 10:41.241 --> 10:44.244 TYLENOL. - TYLENOL? 10:44.277 --> 10:46.279 NO ONE'S ALLERGIC TO TYLENOL. TYLENOL'S WHAT THEY GIVE YOU 10:46.313 --> 10:49.182 WHEN YOU'RE ALLERGIC TO EVERYTHING ELSE. 10:49.216 --> 10:50.350 - OH. 10:50.383 --> 10:53.754 - WELL, UH, CODEINE. CODEINE'S THE WORST. 10:53.787 --> 10:55.088 LIKE, I GET DIARRHEA 10:55.122 --> 10:58.025 AND START VOMITING UNCONTROLLABLY AT THE SAME TIME. 10:58.058 --> 11:00.327 - WELL, WE'LL MAKE SURE AND KEEP THAT ONE ON THE TOP SHELF. 11:00.360 --> 11:06.867 OUT OF REACH. 11:06.900 --> 11:08.869 * 11:08.902 --> 11:10.704 SO ARE YOU COMING OR GOING? 11:12.472 --> 11:15.776 OR COMING AND THEN GOING? 11:15.809 --> 11:17.778 OR COMING AND STAYING? 11:17.811 --> 11:22.349 * 11:22.382 --> 11:24.317 - * LOVE 11:24.351 --> 11:26.219 * JOY 11:26.253 --> 11:27.788 * MAN 11:27.821 --> 11:29.857 * BOY 11:29.890 --> 11:31.358 * LOVE 11:31.391 --> 11:32.960 * JOY 11:32.993 --> 11:35.195 * MAN 11:35.228 --> 11:37.731 * BOY 11:37.765 --> 11:44.371 * 11:44.404 --> 11:46.106 * LOVE 11:46.139 --> 11:47.507 * JOY 11:47.540 --> 11:49.376 * HEY 11:49.409 --> 11:51.311 * BOY 11:55.248 --> 11:57.217 * WALK AWAY 11:57.250 --> 12:02.189 * IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU * 12:02.222 --> 12:03.490 * LEAVE TODAY 12:03.523 --> 12:05.058 - OHH! 12:05.092 --> 12:09.830 - * FOR THE HELL I'LL PUT YOU THROUGH * 12:09.863 --> 12:11.999 * WHAT YOU SAY 12:12.032 --> 12:16.503 * CAN'T EXPLAIN WHAT IT IS YOU GIVE ME * 12:16.536 --> 12:19.239 * IF I LEAVE TODAY 12:19.272 --> 12:22.475 * THERE'LL BE NO MORE DEEP INSIDE ME * 12:22.509 --> 12:26.346 * I WILL TAKE YOUR HEART 12:26.379 --> 12:28.982 * TAKE IT OVER THE EDGE 12:29.016 --> 12:31.118 * TOO YOUNG TO... 12:35.488 --> 12:37.057 - THANK YOU FOR THE LIFT. 12:37.090 --> 12:38.425 - SEE YA. - BYE. 12:47.334 --> 12:49.369 - OH, MY GOD, LOOK. 12:49.402 --> 12:51.438 HE MUST HAVE FOLLOWED US. 12:51.471 --> 12:54.174 - CHRIST, THAT'S JUST WHAT I NEED. 12:54.207 --> 12:56.176 - HONEY, IT'S WHAT WE ALL NEED. 12:56.209 --> 12:58.879 HEY! WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU GOT LAID? 12:58.912 --> 13:00.180 MY POINT EXACTLY. 13:00.213 --> 13:03.416 IF YOU CAN'T REMEMBER, THEN IT'S TIME. 13:03.450 --> 13:05.018 NOW, WHERE ARE YOUR MANNERS? 13:05.052 --> 13:06.854 GO, UH, GO INVITE THE GENTLEMAN IN 13:06.887 --> 13:08.889 WHILE I MAKE SURE NONE OF MY FINE WASHABLES 13:08.922 --> 13:10.323 ARE HANGING IN THE TUB. 13:16.196 --> 13:20.367 [panting] 13:33.046 --> 13:36.083 [moaning] 13:36.116 --> 13:37.350 - DON'T COME YET. 13:37.384 --> 13:40.420 - UHH, I'LL TRY. 13:40.453 --> 13:42.956 [groaning] 13:42.990 --> 13:45.058 STOP. 13:45.092 --> 13:50.397 [panting] 13:50.430 --> 13:52.165 - SO WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO DO? 13:52.199 --> 13:54.301 - DO? 13:54.334 --> 13:56.269 I DON'T KNOW. 13:56.303 --> 13:59.306 WATCH TV, PLAY TOMB RAIDER. 13:59.339 --> 14:02.075 - [chuckles] I MEAN IN BED. 14:02.109 --> 14:03.410 - OH. 14:05.946 --> 14:08.148 THIS IS FINE. 14:08.181 --> 14:11.484 - ARE YOU A TOP OR A BOTTOM? 14:14.554 --> 14:16.223 - TOP... 14:16.256 --> 14:17.657 AND BOTTOM. 14:17.690 --> 14:19.960 - OH, YOU'RE VERSATILE, THEN. 14:19.993 --> 14:21.428 - AND AMBIDEXTROUS... 14:21.461 --> 14:22.629 WHICH WAS REALLY CONFUSING AT FIRST 14:22.662 --> 14:27.234 'CAUSE I COULD NEVER FIGURE OUT WHICH HAND TO THROW WITH. 14:27.267 --> 14:28.668 - DO YOU LIKE TO RIM? 14:28.701 --> 14:30.303 - SURE. 14:30.337 --> 14:31.638 I LOVE IT. 14:31.671 --> 14:35.042 - GREAT. 14:35.075 --> 14:37.010 GO TO IT. 14:38.645 --> 14:40.047 WELL? 14:40.080 --> 14:43.150 - UM, WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU MEAN? 14:43.183 --> 14:45.885 [phone rings] 14:47.287 --> 14:49.056 - YEAH? 14:49.089 --> 14:51.258 WHAT? 14:51.291 --> 14:53.226 - [gasping] - WHEN? 14:53.260 --> 14:54.294 - OHH. 14:54.327 --> 14:55.996 - ARE YOU KIDDING ME? 14:56.029 --> 14:57.064 NO, OF COURSE YOU'RE NOT KIDDING ME. 14:57.097 --> 14:58.932 WHEN DID IT HAPPEN? 14:58.966 --> 15:01.334 WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL ME? 15:01.368 --> 15:04.671 WELL, OF COURSE I WAS OUT. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. 15:04.704 --> 15:06.306 - [grunting] 15:06.339 --> 15:08.208 AGH! AHH! - SHIT! 15:08.241 --> 15:10.243 JESUS CHRIST! I TOLD YOU NOT TO. 15:10.277 --> 15:12.045 - I TRIED. I'M SORRY. 15:12.079 --> 15:13.380 - ALL OVER MY NEW DUVET. - I TRIED, I TRIED. 15:13.413 --> 15:15.715 - THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 15:15.748 --> 15:17.684 - OH, IT'LL WASH OUT, WON'T IT? 15:17.717 --> 15:20.153 I MEAN, YOU SHOULD SEE MY SHEETS AT HOME. 15:20.187 --> 15:21.154 - JUST SOME KID. 15:21.188 --> 15:23.023 WHAT'S YOUR NAME AGAIN? 15:23.056 --> 15:25.558 - JUSTIN. - JUSTIN. 15:25.592 --> 15:27.327 I'LL BE RIGHT THERE. 15:33.400 --> 15:35.135 - OOH, DON'T MIND ME. 15:35.168 --> 15:36.536 JUST, UH, CAN'T SLEEP 15:36.569 --> 15:38.538 WITHOUT MY MILK AND OREOS. 15:38.571 --> 15:40.307 - THAT'S MY FRIEND EMMETT. 15:40.340 --> 15:41.374 HE'S STAYING WITH ME TEMPORARILY 15:41.408 --> 15:43.443 SINCE THE HOOKER WHO LIVED DOWN THE HALL FROM HIM 15:43.476 --> 15:46.713 BURNED HIS APARTMENT BUILDING DOWN TWO YEARS AGO. 15:46.746 --> 15:49.382 - TWO YEARS IS A LONG TIME TO BE TEMPORARY. 15:49.416 --> 15:51.651 - AND YET IT HASN'T INTERFERED WITH MY LOVE LIFE. 15:51.684 --> 15:55.122 WHICH, I SUPPOSE, SAYS A LOT ABOUT MY LOVE LIFE. 15:55.155 --> 15:57.490 - DO YOU MIND IF WE SKIP THE BACK STORY 15:57.524 --> 15:58.591 AND CUT TO THE CHASE? 15:58.625 --> 16:00.660 IT'S ALMOST 2:00 IN THE MORNING. 16:05.465 --> 16:08.168 - YOU HAVE A GREAT ASS. 16:08.201 --> 16:10.037 - OH, YEAH? 16:10.070 --> 16:11.771 OHH. 16:11.804 --> 16:14.274 SO DO YOU. IT'S REALLY... 16:20.513 --> 16:22.315 FIRM. 16:22.349 --> 16:23.683 - IT'S CALLED "THE BUTT." 16:23.716 --> 16:25.285 I GOT IT IN A CATALOGUE. 16:25.318 --> 16:28.255 [phone rings] 16:31.224 --> 16:32.492 - PARTS DEPARTMENT. 16:32.525 --> 16:34.627 - MELANIE CALLED. IT'S HAPPENED. 16:34.661 --> 16:36.096 - WHAT? OH MY GOD! WHEN? 16:36.129 --> 16:38.231 - I DON'T KNOW, I HAD MY DAMN CELL PHONE OFF. 16:38.265 --> 16:40.133 I'M PICKING YOU UP IN TWO MINUTES. 16:40.167 --> 16:42.369 NOW? I... 16:42.402 --> 16:45.505 KIND OF GOT MY HANDS FULL. 16:45.538 --> 16:46.673 - "THE BULGE." 16:46.706 --> 16:49.109 YOU ORDER BOTH, YOU GET A DISCOUNT. 16:49.142 --> 16:50.443 - WHO'S THAT? 16:50.477 --> 16:51.644 - UH, NO ONE. 16:51.678 --> 16:53.780 - MIKEY, YOU'VE GOT SOMEONE THERE WITH YOU. 16:53.813 --> 16:55.282 - I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. 16:55.315 --> 16:56.683 - YOU SHOULD ONLY BE HERE. 16:56.716 --> 16:58.451 - FORGET ABOUT IT, DON'T LET ME BOTHER YOU. 16:58.485 --> 17:00.287 FUCK THE SHIT OUT OF HIM. 17:00.320 --> 17:02.355 - NO, WAIT. PICK ME UP. I'M--I'M READY. 17:02.389 --> 17:03.623 NOW. 17:04.857 --> 17:06.526 - WE GOING TO DO THIS OR NOT? 17:06.559 --> 17:09.129 - I AM REALLY, REALLY SORRY. 17:09.162 --> 17:12.065 UM, A FRIEND OF MINE NEEDS ME. IT'S AN EMERGENCY. 17:12.099 --> 17:14.234 - SHIT. AFTER ALL THAT? - I KNOW. 17:14.267 --> 17:15.635 I PROMISE WE'LL RESCHEDULE THOUGH. 17:15.668 --> 17:17.604 NO IFs, ANDs OR... 17:21.641 --> 17:23.276 - WHAT'S GOING ON? - EVERYTHING. 17:23.310 --> 17:25.212 COME ON, GET UP. YOU GOTTA GO. 17:25.245 --> 17:26.546 - WHERE? - HOME. 17:26.579 --> 17:28.115 - I CAN'T GO HOME NOW. MY-- 17:28.148 --> 17:29.682 MY PARENTS THINK I'M STAYING AT A FRIEND'S. 17:29.716 --> 17:31.151 - YOU LIVE WITH YOUR PARENTS? 17:31.184 --> 17:32.552 - WELL, I'M STILL IN SCHOOL. 17:32.585 --> 17:34.754 I MEAN, COLLEGE. 17:34.787 --> 17:37.257 - WHAT YEAR ARE YOU IN? - JUNIOR. 17:37.290 --> 17:39.826 SOPHOMORE. BETWEEN MY JUNIOR AND SOPHOMORE YEAR. 17:39.859 --> 17:41.161 - HOW OLD ARE YOU? 17:41.194 --> 17:44.564 - 21. 17:44.597 --> 17:47.167 - WHAT YEAR WERE YOU BORN? 17:47.200 --> 17:48.768 - 1979. 17:48.801 --> 17:50.837 - BULLSHIT. YOU HAD TO THINK BEFORE YOU ANSWERED THAT. 17:50.870 --> 17:53.273 HOW OLD ARE YOU REALLY? 17:53.306 --> 17:57.177 - 20. 17:57.210 --> 17:58.211 19. 18:01.681 --> 18:02.582 18. 18:02.615 --> 18:05.518 - WELL, WHAT IS THIS, A MISSILE LAUNCH? 18:05.552 --> 18:07.487 - 17. - [sighs] 18:07.520 --> 18:10.823 WHAT IS WITH KIDS TODAY? 18:10.857 --> 18:13.660 - WE JUST WANT TO GET LAID, LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE. 18:13.693 --> 18:15.828 - HAVE YOU EVER BEEN WITH ANYONE BEFORE? 18:15.862 --> 18:17.597 - SURE. 18:17.630 --> 18:21.334 WELL, NOT EXACTLY. 18:21.368 --> 18:23.303 THIS IS SORT OF MY FIRST. 18:24.637 --> 18:26.806 - I FIGURED. 18:26.839 --> 18:28.241 KIND OF YOUNG, AREN'T YOU? 18:30.277 --> 18:32.679 WELL, I WAS 14 MY FIRST TIME. 18:32.712 --> 18:34.781 - THAT'S REALLY YOUNG. - WITH MY GYM TEACHER. 18:34.814 --> 18:36.483 - I BET HE WAS SOME OLD PERV. 18:36.516 --> 18:41.688 - THAT OLD PERV WAS PROBABLY THE SAME AGE THAT I AM NOW. 18:41.721 --> 18:44.591 IT WAS AFTER SCHOOL IN THE LOCKER ROOMS. 18:44.624 --> 18:46.726 [sighs] HE WAS TAKING A SHOWER. 18:46.759 --> 18:48.595 I WENT BACK FOR SOMETHING. 18:48.628 --> 18:50.863 A BOOK, MY JOCKSTRAP... 18:50.897 --> 18:54.234 I DON'T REMEMBER. 18:54.267 --> 18:57.304 ANYWAY, THERE HE WAS, ALL NAKED, SOAPING HIMSELF. 18:57.337 --> 18:59.172 HE SAW ME THERE, 18:59.206 --> 19:01.941 A BIG BONER UNDER MY CHINOS. 19:01.974 --> 19:03.910 [chuckles] 19:03.943 --> 19:06.613 SHIT. I WALKED RIGHT INTO THE SHOWERS 19:06.646 --> 19:07.780 WITH ALL MY CLOTHES ON. 19:07.814 --> 19:08.781 - NO. 19:08.815 --> 19:10.217 - GOT DOWN ON MY KNEES 19:10.250 --> 19:11.918 AND SUCKED HIM OFF RIGHT THERE. 19:11.951 --> 19:13.786 - HE LET YOU? 19:13.820 --> 19:16.323 - LET ME? 19:16.356 --> 19:17.490 HE LOVED IT. 19:17.524 --> 19:19.792 - I BET YOU WERE SCARED. 19:19.826 --> 19:23.930 - WELL, I GUESS WE'RE ALL A LITTLE SCARED OUR FIRST TIME. 19:29.502 --> 19:31.838 BUT I DON'T REMEMBER ANYMORE. 19:36.943 --> 19:39.446 [car approaching, horn honking] 19:39.479 --> 19:41.514 [tires squeal] 19:46.753 --> 19:47.887 - YOU BROUGHT HIM? 19:47.920 --> 19:49.922 - HE'S GOT NOWHERE TO GO. 19:49.956 --> 19:51.324 GET IN. 19:52.425 --> 19:53.993 - JEEZ. 19:54.026 --> 19:56.996 [techno music] 19:57.029 --> 20:05.204 * 20:19.352 --> 20:20.853 - OH, MY GOD. 20:20.887 --> 20:22.555 - SAY HELLO TO YOUR SON. 20:22.589 --> 20:25.525 [baby cooing] 20:25.558 --> 20:27.627 - WELL, GO ON. 20:35.034 --> 20:36.536 - WHEN DID IT START? 20:36.569 --> 20:38.338 - AROUND 7:00. 20:38.371 --> 20:40.873 - SIX HOURS LATER, THERE HE WAS. 20:40.907 --> 20:43.009 - OH, I WISH I COULD HAVE BEEN HERE. 20:43.042 --> 20:45.345 HOW OFTEN DO I GET TO SEE SNATCH? 20:45.378 --> 20:46.879 - [scoffs] - [chuckles] 20:46.913 --> 20:49.048 LOOKS JUST LIKE YOU. 20:49.081 --> 20:52.018 - I GUESS HE MUST BE MINE THEN. 20:52.051 --> 20:54.387 - WANT TO HOLD HIM? 20:56.623 --> 20:58.057 - OKAY, CAREFUL. DON'T DROP HIM. 20:58.090 --> 21:00.059 - THAT'S JUST WHAT I WAS PLANNING ON DOING. 21:00.092 --> 21:03.530 [baby crying] 21:03.563 --> 21:04.897 - WE'VE BEEN THINKING OF NAMES. 21:04.931 --> 21:07.834 MEL WANTS TO CALL HIM ABRAHAM, AFTER HER GRANDFATHER, 21:07.867 --> 21:09.936 BUT I LIKE GUS. 21:13.540 --> 21:14.674 - WHAT DO YOU THINK? 21:17.410 --> 21:21.047 - YOU WOULDN'T SURVIVE A DAY AT SCHOOL BEING NAMED ABRAHAM. 21:21.080 --> 21:22.849 BUT I GUESS GUS IS OKAY. 21:22.882 --> 21:25.652 - THANK YOU VERY MUCH, AND WHO THE HELL ARE YOU? 21:25.685 --> 21:26.919 - HIS NAME'S J... 21:28.655 --> 21:29.822 - JUSTIN. 21:29.856 --> 21:32.058 - YOU WERE ON THE PHONE WHEN HE SHOT HIS LOAD ALL OVER ME. 21:32.091 --> 21:35.027 [women groan] 21:35.061 --> 21:36.363 - [chuckles] OH, BRIAN! 21:36.396 --> 21:38.398 - HE CAN'T HELP IT. 21:38.431 --> 21:40.500 HE'S ONLY 17. 21:40.533 --> 21:43.403 - SO YOU AND LINDSAY EACH HAD AN INFANT TONIGHT. 21:43.436 --> 21:45.772 - YEAH, BUT MINE DOESN'T SUCK ON MY TITS. 21:45.805 --> 21:46.839 NOT UNLESS I WANT HIM TO. 21:46.873 --> 21:49.576 [baby crying] 21:49.609 --> 21:52.612 "GUS." IT'S A GOOD, BUTCH NAME. 21:52.645 --> 21:54.414 COME ON, GUS, 21:54.447 --> 21:56.849 GIVE YOUR DADDY A SMILE. 21:56.883 --> 21:58.551 [camera clicks] 21:58.585 --> 22:01.087 [baby crying] 22:09.662 --> 22:12.565 - IT'S DISGUSTING, ALL THOSE LESBIANS 22:12.599 --> 22:14.901 FAWNING OVER HIM AND MAKING GOO-GOO TALK. 22:14.934 --> 22:20.006 - THAT'S WHAT WOMEN DO OVER BABIES. 22:20.039 --> 22:22.675 - WHO'S TALKING ABOUT THE BABY? I MEAN JUSTIN. 22:27.480 --> 22:29.982 IT'S KIND OF WEIRD, YOU HAVING A KID. 22:31.618 --> 22:33.653 STILL, IT'S EXCITING, ISN'T IT? 22:33.686 --> 22:37.757 - WHAT? HAVING SOME WRINKLED LITTLE TIME CLOCK TICKING AWAY? 22:37.790 --> 22:40.527 REMINDING YOU THAT YOU'RE GETTING OLDER BY THE MINUTE. 22:40.560 --> 22:41.961 BY THE SECOND? 22:41.994 --> 22:43.129 - KEEP THINKING LIKE THAT 22:43.162 --> 22:45.097 YOU'RE GOING TO END UP PREMATURELY GRAY. 22:45.131 --> 22:47.667 OH, I THINK I SEE ONE. 22:47.700 --> 22:49.368 - OW! 22:53.606 --> 22:55.742 WHY DIDN'T SOMEBODY TRY AND STOP ME? 22:55.775 --> 22:57.877 - HELLO? SOMEBODY DID. 22:57.910 --> 22:59.479 BUT YOU WOULDN'T LISTEN. YOU HAD TO LET LINDSAY 22:59.512 --> 23:01.848 FILL YOUR HEAD WITH ALL HER BULLSHIT FLATTERY. 23:01.881 --> 23:04.016 "OH, BRIAN, YOU'RE SO GOOD LOOKING. 23:04.050 --> 23:07.153 "OH, OH, BRIAN, Y-Y-YOU'RE SO SMART. 23:07.186 --> 23:09.489 "OH, OH, YOU'VE GOT SUCH GREAT GENES, BRIAN, 23:09.522 --> 23:13.593 AND I DON'T MEAN YOUR 501s." 23:13.626 --> 23:16.796 AND NOW YOU'RE STUCK WITH A KID. 23:16.829 --> 23:19.065 FOR LIFE. 23:23.670 --> 23:26.673 - WELL, THERE IS ALWAYS ONE SOLUTION. 23:32.912 --> 23:35.014 I COULD END IT ALL RIGHT NOW. 23:35.047 --> 23:38.050 - OH, THAT'D BE DRAMATIC. 23:38.084 --> 23:41.153 JUST LIKE ER, BIRTH AND DEATH IN THE SAME EPISODE. 23:41.187 --> 23:43.690 NOW GET DOWN! 23:43.723 --> 23:45.057 - NO, YOU'LL HAVE TO COME GET ME. 23:45.091 --> 23:47.226 - I'M SERIOUS. STOP CLOWNING. 23:47.259 --> 23:48.795 - OR I'LL JUMP! 23:48.828 --> 23:50.897 - * I HOPE TO FIND 23:50.930 --> 23:55.067 * WHO'LL HAVE TO BE INSIDE OF ME * 23:55.101 --> 24:01.708 * AND I CAN SEE A SPARK IN YOU * 24:01.741 --> 24:03.976 * WHATEVER YOU DO 24:04.010 --> 24:07.179 * YOU'VE GOTTA STAY TRUE 24:07.213 --> 24:10.817 * 24:10.850 --> 24:12.084 * WHATEVER YOU DO 24:12.118 --> 24:14.987 - COME ON, MIKEY, LET'S FLY. 24:15.021 --> 24:17.757 LIKE IN ALL THOSE COMIC BOOKS. 24:21.728 --> 24:24.997 I'M SUPERMAN. 24:25.031 --> 24:26.733 I'LL SHOW YOU THE WORLD. 24:26.766 --> 24:29.769 - WHY AM I ALWAYS LOIS LANE? 24:29.802 --> 24:34.574 - * OH, TO HOLD YOU NEAR ME * 24:34.607 --> 24:42.582 * 24:45.618 --> 24:48.788 * EVERY TIME I THINK 24:48.821 --> 24:49.889 * THERE'S NO ONE 24:49.922 --> 24:54.694 - CONGRATULATIONS...DAD. 24:54.727 --> 24:58.130 - * EVERY TIME I WONDER 24:58.164 --> 25:00.700 * HOW I'LL COPE 25:00.733 --> 25:04.003 * 25:04.036 --> 25:08.641 * CAN'T WAIT FOR THE SUN TO SHINE * 25:08.675 --> 25:13.880 * WHATEVER LIGHT I HOPE TO FIND... * 25:13.913 --> 25:15.181 - SORRY. 25:17.717 --> 25:18.718 - HONESTLY. 25:18.751 --> 25:20.086 - FUCKED HIM. 25:20.119 --> 25:21.554 - YOU DID NOT. YOU LOOKED AT HIM. 25:21.588 --> 25:22.822 - THAT MAY APPEAR TO BE WHAT HAPPENED, 25:22.855 --> 25:24.123 BUT WE DID IT ALL. 25:24.156 --> 25:25.825 - OH, YEAH? AND HOW WAS HE? 25:25.858 --> 25:27.894 - FABULOUS. 25:27.927 --> 25:29.328 WANT ONE? - NO. 25:29.361 --> 25:32.665 - MORE FOR ME. 25:32.699 --> 25:34.734 LISTEN, YOU'RE GOING TO GO SAY GOOD NIGHT TO LINDSAY. 25:34.767 --> 25:36.636 YOU'RE GOING TO GO HOME, GO TO BED, 25:36.669 --> 25:39.038 AND GET UP AND GO TO WORK FOR THE NEXT 20 YEARS 25:39.071 --> 25:41.641 TO SUPPORT YOUR KID. 25:41.674 --> 25:43.643 - YOU SEE THIS LINE, HOW DEEP IT IS? 25:43.676 --> 25:45.077 THAT MEANS YOU'RE VERY CREATIVE. 25:45.111 --> 25:46.145 - THAT'S TRUE. 25:46.178 --> 25:47.213 I WANT TO BE A CARTOONIST OR A COMPUTER ANIMATOR. 25:47.246 --> 25:50.182 - IT'S FAR TOO LESBIANIC OUT HERE FOR A YOUNG BOY. 25:50.216 --> 25:52.084 OUT. 25:52.118 --> 25:53.820 I'LL MEET YOU OUT FRONT. 25:58.224 --> 26:00.326 - I'M SORRY, SIR, YOU'LL HAVE TO COME BACK TOMORROW. 26:00.359 --> 26:01.928 THE MOTHER NEEDS HER REST. 26:01.961 --> 26:02.995 - AND SO DOES THE FATHER. 26:03.029 --> 26:05.097 - IT'S OKAY, NURSE. 26:08.801 --> 26:11.671 - SWEET DREAMS, SONNY BOY. 26:11.704 --> 26:13.239 FIRST NIGHT ON EARTH. 26:14.807 --> 26:17.844 - HON, COULD YOU GET ME SOME ICE AND MAYBE SOMETHING FIZZY? 26:17.877 --> 26:19.211 - HOW ABOUT SOME GINGER ALE? 26:19.245 --> 26:22.214 MM. MWAH. 26:26.018 --> 26:27.286 - UH, ANYTHING FOR YOU? 26:27.319 --> 26:30.289 - UH, IF YOU SEE ANY AMYL NITRATE LAYING AROUND. 26:38.264 --> 26:39.398 ALONE AT LAST. 26:39.431 --> 26:43.235 - CAREFUL. 26:43.269 --> 26:47.273 - WELL, HERE WE ARE. 26:47.306 --> 26:50.142 MA AND PA. 26:50.176 --> 26:51.711 - [crying] 26:51.744 --> 26:53.012 - HEY. 26:56.115 --> 26:58.918 - DON'T MIND ME. 26:58.951 --> 27:01.988 JUST FEELING A LITTLE... VULNERABLE. 27:05.257 --> 27:08.394 [laughing] 27:08.427 --> 27:10.930 - I PROMISE NOT TO TELL. 27:10.963 --> 27:13.199 - WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT? 27:13.232 --> 27:14.867 YOU AND ME. 27:14.901 --> 27:18.104 PARENTS. 27:18.137 --> 27:22.174 - IT'S PRETTY SCARY, BOYS AND GIRLS. 27:22.208 --> 27:24.043 THINK IT'S TOO LATE TO RETURN IT? 27:24.076 --> 27:26.278 - WE COULD TRY. 27:26.312 --> 27:30.883 OH, GOD. 27:30.917 --> 27:32.919 I GUESS THIS MEANS WE'RE FINALLY GROWN-UPS. 27:32.952 --> 27:34.721 - "DON'T SAY THAT, WENDY, 27:34.754 --> 27:35.922 WE'LL NEVER GROW UP." 27:35.955 --> 27:38.024 - DON'T BE SCARED. 27:38.057 --> 27:42.061 HELL, IF OUR PARENTS COULD FUCK UP, SO CAN WE. 27:45.464 --> 27:47.266 - I DON'T WANT YOU TO WORRY. 27:47.299 --> 27:49.001 ABOUT MONEY, I MEAN. 27:49.035 --> 27:50.202 IF YOU NEED ANYTHING-- 27:50.236 --> 27:53.039 - NO, WE'LL BE ALL RIGHT. 27:53.072 --> 27:54.941 BUT THANKS. 28:00.346 --> 28:02.181 - I WOULD'VE FUCKED YOU, YOU KNOW? 28:02.214 --> 28:04.083 - OHH. 28:04.116 --> 28:05.184 - IF I WASN'T AFRAID 28:05.217 --> 28:06.452 YOUR LOVER'D BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF ME. 28:06.485 --> 28:08.120 - STOP. 28:08.154 --> 28:09.288 - I MEAN IT. 28:09.321 --> 28:11.123 SHE COULD TAKE OUT OSCAR DE LA RENTA. 28:11.157 --> 28:14.326 - YOU MEAN LA HOYA. 28:14.360 --> 28:16.829 - WHATEVER. [both chuckle] 28:16.863 --> 28:20.366 - WELL, YOU HAD PLENTY OF CHANCES. 28:20.399 --> 28:22.735 - AND I TOOK ADVANTAGE OF A FEW, IF I RECALL. 28:22.769 --> 28:25.838 - IT WASN'T HALF BAD. 28:25.872 --> 28:28.174 - NOW YOU TELL ME? 28:28.207 --> 28:31.510 YOU MEAN I COULD HAVE BEEN STRAIGHT THIS WHOLE TIME? 28:31.543 --> 28:34.480 - I WOULDN'T SAY THAT. 28:34.513 --> 28:37.249 - WELL, THEN I GUESS IT'S JUST AS WELL. 28:46.158 --> 28:47.994 - ICE? 28:49.528 --> 28:52.064 - TICK-TICK-TICK. 28:52.098 --> 28:54.100 TICK. 28:54.133 --> 28:55.301 TICK. 28:55.334 --> 28:56.502 TICK. 28:56.535 --> 28:58.037 TICK. 28:58.070 --> 29:01.107 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 29:01.140 --> 29:02.842 - I'M JUST REPEATING THE FIRST WORDS 29:02.875 --> 29:04.310 MY SONNY BOY SAID TO ME. 29:04.343 --> 29:06.445 IT WASN'T "DA-DA." 29:06.478 --> 29:10.016 IT WAS, "TICK-TICK-TICK-TICK." 29:10.049 --> 29:13.552 SMART LITTLE FUCKER. 29:13.585 --> 29:15.988 HE CAN TELL TIME ALREADY. 29:16.022 --> 29:19.091 - BRIAN, WHAT DID YOU TAKE? 29:19.125 --> 29:23.462 - * A-B-C-D-E-E-E 29:23.495 --> 29:24.931 [chuckles] 29:24.964 --> 29:27.766 I'M JUST TEACHING MY KID THE ALPHABET. 29:30.269 --> 29:32.204 I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU. 29:32.238 --> 29:36.308 I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU ALL...NIGHT. 29:36.342 --> 29:38.410 * 29:38.444 --> 29:40.112 - [panting] 29:40.146 --> 29:42.448 [zipper unzips] 29:46.585 --> 29:50.389 [revs engine, tires screech] 29:50.422 --> 29:51.557 - SHIT! 29:51.590 --> 29:54.026 - SORRY, I DIDN'T WANT TO HIT THAT DOGGIE. 29:54.060 --> 29:55.461 - FUCK THE DOGGIE. 29:55.494 --> 29:57.129 - OKAY, BOY WONDER. 29:57.163 --> 29:59.031 I'M TAKING YOU HOME. WHERE DO I TURN? 29:59.065 --> 30:00.166 - HE'S GOING WITH ME. 30:00.199 --> 30:01.400 - OH, NO, HE'S NOT. 30:01.433 --> 30:03.903 - POP QUIZ. NO TALKING. 30:03.936 --> 30:06.138 HERE'S A QUESTION. MULTIPLE CHOICE. 30:06.172 --> 30:07.439 DO YOU WANT TO COME HOME WITH ME? 30:07.473 --> 30:09.175 "A," YES. 30:09.208 --> 30:11.143 "B," YES. 30:11.177 --> 30:13.445 OR "C," YES. 30:13.479 --> 30:15.047 TICK, TICK, TICK. TIME'S UP. 30:15.081 --> 30:18.017 PENCILS DOWN. WHAT DO YOU SAY? 30:18.050 --> 30:19.852 - NONE OF THE ABOVE. 30:19.886 --> 30:20.887 HE'S GOING HOME. 30:20.920 --> 30:22.521 - I'M GOING WITH HIM. 30:25.024 --> 30:27.326 - GOOD BOY. 30:27.359 --> 30:29.428 YOU GET AN A-PLUS. 30:34.233 --> 30:36.402 [heavy breathing] 30:40.672 --> 30:43.175 - [gasping] 30:46.612 --> 30:49.481 [gasping loudly] 30:49.515 --> 30:52.218 - NOW YOU KNOW WHAT RIMMING IS. 30:55.121 --> 30:57.523 - HE CALLS ME, PRACTICALLY BEGS ME TO GO WITH HIM, 30:57.556 --> 30:59.225 KNOWING FULL WELL I'M WITH SOMEONE 30:59.258 --> 31:01.293 FOR THE FIRST TIME IN I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG. 31:01.327 --> 31:04.230 - SEVEN MONTHS, TWO WEEKS, AND THREE DAYS. 31:04.263 --> 31:05.497 - THANK YOU. 31:05.531 --> 31:07.599 AND EVEN THOUGH THE GUY WASN'T ALL HE WAS CRACKED UP TO BE... 31:07.633 --> 31:09.601 - WE'LL LET THAT REMARK PASS. 31:09.635 --> 31:11.904 - AT LEAST HE WANTED ME. 31:11.938 --> 31:12.871 ME. 31:16.408 --> 31:19.411 GOD, I AM SO HORNY! 31:19.445 --> 31:21.580 - POOR BABY. 31:21.613 --> 31:23.215 WELL, I HAVE JUST THE THING. 31:23.249 --> 31:24.984 A NEW PORN VIDEO. 31:25.017 --> 31:28.687 IT ALL TAKES PLACE IN A PRISONER-OF-WAR CAMP. 31:28.720 --> 31:32.058 "HOT, HORNY MEN STARVED FOR ACTION." 31:32.091 --> 31:33.993 - I CAN RELATE TO THAT. 31:34.026 --> 31:36.662 - GUARANTEED TO MAKE YOUR PRIVATES STAND UP AND SALUTE. 31:36.695 --> 31:38.197 SCHINDLER'S FIST? 31:38.230 --> 31:39.932 - [groans] 31:39.966 --> 31:42.634 HERE, I WILL LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE. 31:42.668 --> 31:44.203 I'M SURE YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE A DEEP, 31:44.236 --> 31:46.272 MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIP. 31:46.305 --> 31:47.940 GOOD NIGHT. 31:53.012 --> 31:54.713 - [on TV] OKAY, PRIVATE, DROP TROU 31:54.746 --> 31:56.082 AND BEND OVER. 31:56.115 --> 31:57.316 - [on TV] FOR MY PHYSICAL, SIR? 31:57.349 --> 31:59.018 - NO, TARGET PRACTICE. 31:59.051 --> 32:00.286 - YES, SIR. 32:00.319 --> 32:01.587 - [lecherous chuckle] 32:01.620 --> 32:03.489 - PUT YOUR LEGS UP... 32:03.522 --> 32:07.293 ON MY SHOULDERS. 32:07.326 --> 32:08.627 THAT'S IT. 32:10.462 --> 32:12.031 - OH, WAIT. 32:12.064 --> 32:14.166 IN SCHOOL, WE HAD THIS LECTURE... 32:14.200 --> 32:17.103 ABOUT SAFE SEX. 32:17.136 --> 32:19.471 - AND NOW WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A DEMONSTRATION. 32:23.009 --> 32:24.010 PTUH! 32:26.212 --> 32:28.380 PUT IT ON ME. 32:28.414 --> 32:30.349 GO ON. 32:30.382 --> 32:32.484 SLIP IT ON MY DICK. 32:42.761 --> 32:45.164 - AH! IT'S COLD. 32:45.197 --> 32:46.632 - IT'LL HEAT UP. 32:48.767 --> 32:50.269 - JUST... 32:50.302 --> 32:52.138 GO SLOW, OKAY? 33:00.146 --> 33:01.413 AGH! 33:01.447 --> 33:04.183 AH! AH! 33:04.216 --> 33:06.685 [panting] IT HURTS. 33:06.718 --> 33:08.320 DOES IT ALWAYS HURT? 33:08.354 --> 33:11.457 A LITTLE BIT. 33:11.490 --> 33:14.393 BUT THAT'S A PART OF IT. 33:14.426 --> 33:17.229 [exhales] 33:17.263 --> 33:18.297 NOW RELAX. 33:22.068 --> 33:26.472 I WANT YOU TO ALWAYS REMEMBER THIS. 33:26.505 --> 33:32.211 SO THAT NO MATTER WHO YOU'RE EVER WITH... 33:32.244 --> 33:35.647 I'LL ALWAYS BE THERE. 33:35.681 --> 33:38.584 - * WHEREVER YOU GO 33:38.617 --> 33:40.652 * 33:40.686 --> 33:44.290 * WHATEVER YOU DO 33:44.323 --> 33:49.128 * YOU'LL NEVER FORGET ME, BABY * 33:49.161 --> 33:52.798 * I'LL BE A PART OF YOU 33:52.831 --> 33:57.769 * I'LL BE A PART OF YOU * 33:57.803 --> 34:02.308 * WHEREVER YOU GO - [groaning and gasping] 34:02.341 --> 34:05.611 - * CARRY ME WITH YOU, BABY 34:05.644 --> 34:09.748 - [groaning] 34:09.781 --> 34:19.291 * 34:19.325 --> 34:22.361 * CARRY ME WITH YOU 34:22.394 --> 34:23.662 [alarm clock chirping] 34:23.695 --> 34:27.566 * FOR BETTER OR WORSE 34:27.599 --> 34:31.603 * CARRY ME WITH YOU, BABY... * 34:35.507 --> 34:38.076 - [sighs] 34:55.761 --> 34:59.698 WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE? 34:59.731 --> 35:03.735 - YOU SAID I COULD STAY. 35:03.769 --> 35:04.870 - RIGHT. 35:04.903 --> 35:06.572 YOUR PARENTS. 35:06.605 --> 35:09.341 THEY THINK YOU'RE AT A FRIEND'S. 35:16.515 --> 35:19.385 JESUS CHRIST! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED? 35:20.886 --> 35:22.254 - [laughs] 35:22.288 --> 35:24.323 - DON'T TELL ME. 35:24.356 --> 35:25.757 I WAS DOING HANDSTANDS. 35:25.791 --> 35:27.326 - AND JUGGLING. 35:27.359 --> 35:29.561 YOU'RE NOT VERY GOOD. 35:29.595 --> 35:31.430 - SHIT. 35:31.463 --> 35:34.566 WHY DO I DO THESE THINGS? 35:34.600 --> 35:36.435 I'LL TELL YOU WHY. 35:36.468 --> 35:39.371 IT WAS THAT FUCKING PIG ANITA. 35:39.405 --> 35:41.640 SHE TOLD ME THAT WAS "E." THAT WASN'T "E," 35:41.673 --> 35:44.776 THAT WAS SOME SHIT THEY COOKED UP IN A BATHTUB IN TIJUANA. 35:44.810 --> 35:46.645 - THAT'S WHY YOU SHOULD NEVER TAKE DRUGS 35:46.678 --> 35:48.414 THAT AREN'T PRESCRIBED BY A PHYSICIAN 35:48.447 --> 35:51.750 OR RECOMMENDED BY A RELIABLE PHARMACIST. 35:53.585 --> 35:55.354 - [chuckles] 35:55.387 --> 35:56.555 WHAT ARE YOU, 35:56.588 --> 35:58.757 A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT? 36:00.926 --> 36:02.961 GET DRESSED, I'LL DRIVE YOU HOME. 36:02.994 --> 36:05.931 - YOU CAN'T. 36:05.964 --> 36:08.834 MICHAEL HAS THE CAR. - WHY HAS HE GOT IT? 36:08.867 --> 36:10.669 - YOU WERE TOO HIGH-- - I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. 36:10.702 --> 36:12.738 I WAS THERE. 36:12.771 --> 36:16.375 I REMEMBER EVERYTHING... 36:16.408 --> 36:17.609 PERFECTLY. 36:20.312 --> 36:21.747 WHAT WAS YOUR NAME AGAIN? 36:21.780 --> 36:24.683 - JUSTIN. 36:24.716 --> 36:27.953 - YEAH, RIGHT. 36:27.986 --> 36:30.456 [sighing] 36:30.489 --> 36:31.690 - CAN I TAKE A SHOWER? 36:31.723 --> 36:34.293 - YEAH, BUT HURRY UP. 36:34.326 --> 36:36.795 IT'S THROUGH THERE... 36:36.828 --> 36:38.730 I THINK. 36:48.340 --> 36:49.841 [answering machine beeps] 36:49.875 --> 36:51.310 - [on machine] WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU? 36:51.343 --> 36:52.844 I'VE BEEN TRYING YOUR CELL. IT'S TURNED OFF. 36:52.878 --> 36:54.280 IF YOU'RE THERE, PICK UP! 36:54.313 --> 36:56.448 BRIAN? LISTEN, LINDSAY'S WATER BROKE. 36:56.482 --> 36:58.917 SHE'S HAVING CONTRACTIONS. WE'RE AT THE HOSPITAL. 37:02.488 --> 37:04.456 FUCK! I HAVE A BABY. 37:04.490 --> 37:06.725 [shower running, Justin humming] 37:06.758 --> 37:08.960 - OW! OW! 37:08.994 --> 37:11.229 - TWO BABIES. 37:14.065 --> 37:15.834 [car alarm whooping] 37:15.867 --> 37:16.868 [glass smashes] 37:24.075 --> 37:27.579 - HOLY SHIT! [spray can hissing] 37:27.613 --> 37:29.615 YOU LITTLE BASTARDS! GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM THERE! 37:29.648 --> 37:31.383 - FAGGOT! - QUEER! 37:31.417 --> 37:32.751 - FAGGOT! 37:32.784 --> 37:34.052 - WHO YOU CALLING A FAGGOT? 37:34.085 --> 37:36.588 - WE'VE SEEN YOU! - FUCKING QUEER! 37:53.639 --> 37:55.907 - [cheerful] MORNIN'. 37:55.941 --> 37:57.876 [laughs] OH, MY LORD. 37:57.909 --> 37:58.944 - MOTHERFUCKERS! 37:58.977 --> 38:00.912 I'M CALLING THE COPS. 38:00.946 --> 38:02.914 - BRIAN IS GOING TO HAVE A FIT. 38:02.948 --> 38:05.484 YOU KNOW HOW HE FEELS ABOUT HIS JEEP. 38:05.517 --> 38:06.918 - WELL, IF HE CARES SO MUCH ABOUT IT 38:06.952 --> 38:08.587 THEN HE SHOULDN'T HAVE LENT IT TO ME. 38:08.620 --> 38:11.690 HE KNOWS WHAT A TERRIBLE NEIGHBORHOOD THIS IS. 38:11.723 --> 38:13.825 - WELL, I, UH, I WAS GOING TO ASK FOR A LIFT TO WORK, 38:13.859 --> 38:16.795 BUT, ON SECOND THOUGHT, I THINK I'LL WALK. 38:16.828 --> 38:19.431 HAVE A NICE DAY. 38:19.465 --> 38:21.567 - SHIT! 38:29.441 --> 38:32.378 [shower running] 38:36.382 --> 38:38.016 - AHH. 38:45.957 --> 38:48.860 - WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME I HAD A KID? 38:48.894 --> 38:50.796 - YOU SAID YOU REMEMBERED EVERYTHING. 38:50.829 --> 38:53.932 - OHH, IT ALL HAPPENED SO FAST. 38:53.965 --> 38:55.801 WHAT'S HIS NAME AGAIN? 38:55.834 --> 38:57.669 - GUS. 38:57.703 --> 38:59.638 I'M THE ONE WHO DECIDED. 38:59.671 --> 39:02.441 - [scoffs] 39:02.474 --> 39:03.709 - DID YOU ACTUALLY FUCK HER? 39:03.742 --> 39:05.777 - WHO? - LINDSAY. 39:05.811 --> 39:09.047 - YOU'RE AWFULLY RUDE. - WELL, DID YOU? 39:09.080 --> 39:10.949 - I JERKED OFF IN A CUP, 39:10.982 --> 39:13.018 AND THEY SQUIRTED IT UP HER. 39:13.051 --> 39:14.119 - GROSS. 39:14.152 --> 39:16.121 SHE MUST HAVE REALLY WANTED A KID. 39:16.154 --> 39:18.657 - MOST WOMEN DO. 39:18.690 --> 39:20.158 - EVEN LESBIANS? 39:20.191 --> 39:23.729 - LESBIANS ARE WOMEN... 39:23.762 --> 39:26.498 SORT OF. 39:26.532 --> 39:29.735 - MY MOM SAYS SOMETIMES SHE WISHED SHE NEVER HAD ME. 39:29.768 --> 39:31.069 - THAT'S PROBABLY BECAUSE SHE'S STUCK 39:31.102 --> 39:34.372 WITH THIS ANNOYING BRAT FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE. 39:37.976 --> 39:40.479 - SO...ARE YOU GOING TO RAISE HIM? 39:40.512 --> 39:42.514 - [laughing] ME? 39:42.548 --> 39:44.750 NO WAY. 39:44.783 --> 39:47.152 THE MUNCHERS ARE. 39:47.185 --> 39:49.888 BUT I'LL BE AROUND TO PROVIDE THE MASCULINE INFLUENCE 39:49.921 --> 39:53.759 SO IMPORTANT IN EVERY YOUNG BOY'S LIFE. 39:53.792 --> 39:55.761 - I BET MELANIE COULD DO IT BETTER THAN YOU. 39:55.794 --> 39:58.630 - DON'T GET SMART OR I'LL HAVE TO SPANK YOU. 39:58.664 --> 40:00.966 - REALLY? 40:13.545 --> 40:17.483 - YOU UP FOR ONE MORE? 40:17.516 --> 40:19.585 - [grunts] 40:19.618 --> 40:22.721 [rock song] 40:22.754 --> 40:27.092 * 40:27.125 --> 40:30.529 [tires screech] - BRIAN! 40:30.562 --> 40:42.173 * 40:42.207 --> 40:45.844 - CHRIST! DIDN'T YOU GET ENOUGH LAST NIGHT? 40:48.279 --> 40:52.984 - THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS ENOUGH. 40:53.018 --> 40:55.587 BESIDES, I COULDN'T SEND HIM OFF 40:55.621 --> 40:58.757 WITHOUT A NOURISHING, HIGH-PROTEIN BREAKFAST. 40:58.790 --> 41:01.827 IT'S GRRRREAT! 41:01.860 --> 41:03.695 - [chuckles] 41:06.297 --> 41:07.699 - WILL YOU COME ON? 41:07.733 --> 41:10.536 I'M NOT GOING TO BE LATE BECAUSE OF YOU. 41:10.569 --> 41:13.038 - * IN A HURRY 41:13.071 --> 41:16.107 * IN A HURRY 41:16.141 --> 41:18.677 * LIGHT IN THE MIRROR 41:18.710 --> 41:21.246 * NOTHING COMING CLEARER 41:21.279 --> 41:24.015 - I SAID HURRY UP! 41:24.049 --> 41:26.251 - * AND EVERYBODY ELSE 41:26.284 --> 41:29.621 * IS IN A HURRY 41:29.655 --> 41:31.823 * IN A HURRY - YEAH, WHAT DID SHE SAY? 41:31.857 --> 41:34.225 - SHE SAID, "DON'T BE LATE." 41:36.094 --> 41:38.597 OH, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL, MIKEY. 41:38.630 --> 41:40.265 JUST BEAUTIFUL. 41:40.298 --> 41:41.432 - IT'S NOT MY FAULT. 41:41.466 --> 41:44.135 I TOLD YOU ABOUT THOSE TWO PSYCHOPATHS DOWN THE STREET. 41:44.169 --> 41:45.737 - WHAT, A COUPLE OF 12-YEAR-OLDS? 41:45.771 --> 41:47.839 - THEY START EARLY THESE DAYS. 41:47.873 --> 41:49.274 WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING AT? 41:49.307 --> 41:50.876 - NOTHING. 41:50.909 --> 41:53.211 YOU. 41:53.244 --> 41:55.847 YOU SOUND LIKE MY PARENTS FIGHTING. 41:58.650 --> 41:59.951 - IT DOESN'T MATTER ANYWAY. 41:59.985 --> 42:01.753 IT'S A COMPANY CAR. 42:04.089 --> 42:06.825 WELL, COME ON, WE HAVE TO TAKE THE CHILD TO SCHOOL. 42:06.858 --> 42:09.160 - IN THIS? 42:09.194 --> 42:12.297 - YOU CARE? 42:12.330 --> 42:14.132 - FUCK, NO. 42:17.803 --> 42:19.871 [tires squeal] 42:21.940 --> 42:23.775 [horn honks] 42:30.115 --> 42:32.651 [tires squeal] 42:32.684 --> 42:34.052 [students laughing] 42:34.085 --> 42:35.353 [all chattering] - NO WAY! 42:35.386 --> 42:37.589 - LOOK AT THAT. - LOOK AT THIS. 42:37.623 --> 42:39.124 [chattering continues] 42:39.157 --> 42:41.292 - HERE WE ARE, SONNY BOY. 42:41.326 --> 42:43.228 - AND BE SURE TO COME HOME RIGHT AFTER SCHOOL. 42:43.261 --> 42:44.830 - NO LINGERING ON THE PLAYGROUND 42:44.863 --> 42:47.198 OR IN THE LOCKER ROOM WITH THE GYM TEACHER. 42:47.232 --> 42:50.301 - OH, YOU DID NOT TELL HIM ABOUT THAT? 42:50.335 --> 42:52.838 - IT'S THE MOST FAMOUS SHOWER SCENE SINCE PSYCHO. 42:52.871 --> 42:55.140 - HEY, JUSTIN! 42:55.173 --> 42:57.709 YOU WANT TO SUCK ME OFF? [laughter] 42:57.743 --> 43:00.345 - NO, BUT I'LL KICK YOUR TIGHT LITTLE VIRGIN ASS SO HARD 43:00.378 --> 43:01.880 YOU WON'T SIT DOWN FOR A WEEK. 43:01.913 --> 43:04.149 [laughter and chatter] 43:06.084 --> 43:07.986 - CAN WE GET OUT OF HERE? 43:10.088 --> 43:11.690 - WHEN CAN I SEE YOU AGAIN? 43:11.723 --> 43:12.924 - YOU CAN SEE ME RIGHT NOW. 43:12.958 --> 43:14.860 - I MEAN LATER, TONIGHT. 43:14.893 --> 43:16.027 - [chuckles] 43:16.061 --> 43:19.230 WHO KNOWS WHERE I'LL BE LATER TONIGHT. 43:19.264 --> 43:21.667 - BETTER GO. 43:21.700 --> 43:25.070 - PLEASE? 43:25.103 --> 43:26.738 - I'LL SEE YOU IN YOUR DREAMS. 43:28.874 --> 43:31.242 [engine starts] 43:35.814 --> 43:38.817 [school bell rings] 43:42.187 --> 43:43.354 [tires screech] - OH, MY GOD. 43:43.388 --> 43:46.057 [indistinct chatter] 43:48.960 --> 43:50.862 - WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? 43:50.896 --> 43:52.363 YOUR MOM CALLED. 43:52.397 --> 43:54.032 I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO TELL HER. 43:54.065 --> 43:56.034 I SAID YOU WERE STILL ASLEEP. 43:56.067 --> 43:58.804 - I JUST SAW THE FACE OF GOD. 43:58.837 --> 43:59.938 - HUH? 43:59.971 --> 44:02.774 - HIS NAME IS BRIAN KINNEY. 44:02.808 --> 44:04.309 [car horns blaring] 44:04.342 --> 44:06.277 - THANK GOD HE'S FINALLY GONE. 44:06.311 --> 44:08.446 - HE ALMOST WORE ME OUT. 44:08.479 --> 44:11.082 - SOMEBODY WORE YOU OUT? 44:11.116 --> 44:14.686 - I SAID ALMOST. 44:14.720 --> 44:16.454 I'LL DROP YOU BY THE STORE. 44:16.487 --> 44:18.056 - HEH, THE HELL YOU WILL. 44:18.089 --> 44:19.725 YOU BETTER GET THIS THING REPAINTED 44:19.758 --> 44:20.992 BEFORE YOU GO INTO THE OFFICE. 44:21.026 --> 44:22.994 - I'M NOT HAVING IT REPAINTED. 44:23.028 --> 44:24.229 - WHAT? 44:24.262 --> 44:25.731 - I LIKE IT THIS WAY. 44:25.764 --> 44:27.298 - ARE YOU CRAZY? 44:27.332 --> 44:30.936 [car horns beeping] 44:30.969 --> 44:32.370 - NO, THEY ARE. 44:32.403 --> 44:34.906 WELL, I SAY FUCK 'EM. 44:34.940 --> 44:38.777 THEY CAN WRITE IT IN NEON ACROSS THE SKY. 44:38.810 --> 44:41.079 FAGGOT! - [laughs] 44:41.112 --> 44:42.247 - HA HA! 44:42.280 --> 44:43.782 [both laughing] 44:43.815 --> 44:45.150 [car horns honking] 44:45.183 --> 44:48.153 [rock song] 44:48.186 --> 44:57.395 * 44:57.428 --> 45:00.398 [mellow pop ballad] 45:00.431 --> 45:10.909 * 45:10.942 --> 45:16.982 - * IF I COULD LAY ME DOWN NOW * 45:17.015 --> 45:23.054 * IF I COULD PRAY AND SLEEP 45:23.088 --> 45:29.094 * THE NIGHT NEVER ENDING 45:29.127 --> 45:31.296 * MY WEARY SOUL... 45:31.329 --> 45:34.299 [techno music, cries and grunts] 45:34.332 --> 45:42.273 * 46:17.108 --> 46:19.010 [woman laughing] 47:46.664 --> 47:48.166 - * COME ON 47:48.199 --> 47:52.637 * 47:52.670 --> 47:54.439 * I WANNA HEAR IT 47:54.472 --> 47:56.942 * 47:56.975 --> 47:59.210 * LET'S GET SOAKIN' WET